so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
