Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
