dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Randomize
