you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Randomize
