don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
