Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Randomize
