I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Randomize
