Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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