it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Randomize
