Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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