Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
