You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
