This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
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