that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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