he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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