Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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