Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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