Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
My vagina just clenched in fear
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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