I'm drive I can fine osifer
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i love accidental penises.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize