Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
