You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
