At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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