one might say we're banned from that church
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Randomize
