doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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