Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
