I'm jealous of your bromance
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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