I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
