I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
His nipple licking is glorious
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