This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
