Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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