Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize
