Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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