No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
