it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
