I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
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