i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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