Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
We left an ass print on the piano.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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