There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
