god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Randomize
