I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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