Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
The best revenge is premature balding
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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