chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
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