If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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