So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize