She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
