Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
cat food counts as protein by the way
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Randomize