ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
where am i from again
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
