Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
