Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
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