As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
