Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
ugly people sure do ruin things
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize