You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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